I’m 40 with a net worth of $8.5 million and want to retire early but my in-laws think it’s immoral. What should I do?

A Redditor has worked hard to amass an $8.5 million fortune at 40 years old. He also has a $4 million property with a $500,000 mortgage and a rental property as well. Feeling burned out at work, he wants to…

Published November 10, 2025, 10:19am ET · 6 min read

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A Redditor has worked hard to build an $8.5 million fortune by age 40. He owns a $4 million property with a $500,000 remaining mortgage and a rental property on top of that. Burned out and running low on enthusiasm for his career, he wants to step away once his net worth reaches $10 million, a milestone he expects to hit within two years at his current earnings pace of $1.5 to $2.0 million per year.

The financial case for stepping away is solid. The deeper obstacle is family pressure. His spouse and in-laws believe retiring early is immoral, a stance rooted in religious conviction. The Christian New Testament, in 2 Thessalonians 3:10-12, states: “For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: ‘The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.'” Sikhism makes a similar demand through the principle of Kirat Karo, which calls on followers to “earn an honest, pure and dedicated living” and to avoid idleness.

Beyond religion, the father-in-law’s biography shapes the family’s worldview. He started with nothing and built a $20 million business through decades of labor. His daughter wants to join that business, and the Redditor has no interest in doing so. The result is a genuine paradox: the couple would be trading their peak-health years for additional wealth they do not need, with a likely $20 million inheritance waiting in the background. Whether continued work serves any practical purpose at this point is less a financial question than a philosophical one.

He shared the details in this Reddit post. The situation raises several practical and personal finance angles worth examining, though anyone in a similar position should speak with a financial advisor before making major decisions.

How many people retire in their 40s?

24/7 Wall St.

Money Doesn’t Seem to Be the Issue, But Inflation Is

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With an $8.5 million net worth, money simply is not the constraint here. A standard 4% withdrawal rate applied to that portfolio would generate $340,000 per year before taxes, comfortably above what most households spend. The ChubbyFIRE community targets a comfortable early retirement and typically defines its portfolio range at roughly $2.5 million to $5 million in invested assets. FatFIRE covers the territory from around $5 million upward, where spending tradeoffs largely disappear. At $8.5 million, the Redditor sits deep in FatFIRE territory, and his anxiety about retirement feasibility traces back to family dynamics far more than to arithmetic.

Inflation is a genuine planning variable that deserves attention in any retirement spanning four or more decades. As of mid-September 2026, projections for the 2027 Social Security cost-of-living adjustment (COLA) are converging in the mid-3% range ahead of the official October 14 announcement. AARP now forecasts a 3.6% adjustment, which would raise the average retired worker’s benefit by $75 per month. The Senior Citizens League (TSCL) projects 3.5%, revised down from its earlier estimate of 3.6%, while independent Social Security analyst Mary Johnson also lands at 3.5% after revising downward from her August estimate of 3.4%. Both TSCL and AARP note that volatile energy prices could still shift the final number before September CPI data is locked in. All three projections come in above the 2026 COLA of 2.8% and above the roughly 2.6% 20-year average COLA recorded between 2001 and 2024, and for someone sustaining a comfortable lifestyle over four decades, those dynamics carry real weight even for a portfolio of this size.

The spouse also earns $250,000 to $300,000 per year but reports her own burnout. She wants to eventually join her family’s business and may be the only person positioned to keep it running. That creates an opening for a different kind of conversation with the in-laws. Rather than debating whether the Redditor should keep working indefinitely, the family could explore what is sometimes called a “living inheritance,” putting wealth to work for shared experiences while the parents are still alive to enjoy them alongside their children.

The Couple Can Pivot to Fractional or Consultancy Roles

Remote work

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A practical middle ground exists between full retirement and the grind driving this couple toward burnout. Rather than walking away entirely or staying in demanding full-time roles, they could pursue fractional executive work or project-based consulting. That kind of arrangement preserves professional identity and satisfies the in-laws’ conviction that meaningful work is a moral good, while cutting the workload substantially. The husband stays engaged in his field without the hours and pressure that accompany a senior corporate role.

Burnout at this life stage is far from unusual. The Eagle Hill Consulting Workforce Burnout Survey 2025, conducted by Ipsos in November 2025 with more than 1,400 U.S. employees, found that 55% of the U.S. workforce is currently experiencing burnout. Younger cohorts bear the sharpest impact: Gen Z reports burnout at 66%, followed by Millennials at 58%, Gen X at 53%, and Baby Boomers at 37%. The survey also found that burned-out employees are nearly three times more likely to plan to leave their employer within the year. Only 42% of burned-out workers have told their manager about the problem, and among those who do speak up, 42% say their manager takes no action to help. For someone who has spent nearly two decades building an eight-figure fortune, the depletion that comes with that kind of sustained effort is entirely predictable. Treating burnout as a signal rather than something to push through is a reasonable response, not a moral failing.

Apply “Die With Zero” and Time Bucketing

Senior couple walking

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One commenter in the Reddit thread recommended Die With Zero, Bill Perkins’ 2020 book that challenges the conventional wisdom of saving as much as possible for as long as possible. Perkins argues that health, energy, and time all decline with age, and that money spent on experiences during peak health years produces far more life satisfaction than the same dollars spent in one’s 70s or 80s. The book is widely read in the FIRE community because it reframes the central question away from “how much is enough?” and toward “when should I actually start living on what I’ve built?”

The practical tool Perkins recommends is called “time bucketing.” The exercise involves drawing a personal timeline from the present to the end of life, dividing it into intervals of roughly five to ten years, and mapping specific experiences or goals to each interval. A 40-year-old who wants to hike Patagonia, take a sabbatical in Southeast Asia, or coach his children’s sports teams is in precisely the right health window for all of those things today. Waiting until 65 closes many doors that are still wide open right now.

The same logic applies to the inheritance question lurking in this story. Perkins notes that most inheritances arrive around age 60, well past the years when a financial windfall would most change someone’s life. Giving earlier, while the giver is alive to see the impact, tends to produce more joy on both sides. For the in-laws, that framing could recast the entire conversation: supporting the couple’s early retirement is not an endorsement of idleness but an act of deliberate and timely generosity.

The harder conversation is with the spouse. A useful starting point is asking what she would most want to do if work schedules were no longer the constraint. Envisioning that life concretely, whether it involves the family business, a scaled-back role, or something else entirely, moves the decision beyond abstract debates about morality and toward a plan both partners can genuinely commit to.

Editor’s note: This pass updated the 2027 Social Security COLA projections to reflect figures current as of September 11, 2026. TSCL’s estimate was revised from 3.6% to 3.5%, AARP’s estimate was revised from 3.5% to 3.6%, and Mary Johnson’s estimate was revised from 3.7% to 3.5%, consistent with the latest CPI-W data. The burnout section was expanded to include Eagle Hill’s finding that only 42% of burned-out workers tell their manager, and that of those, 42% say no action is taken.

Contact [email protected] for any questions or corrections.

Marc Guberti

Marc Guberti is a personal finance writer who has written for US News & World Report, Business Insider, Newsweek and other publications. He also hosts the Breakthrough Success Podcast which teaches listeners how to use content marketing to grow their businesses.

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