Maybe you remember the “Bear Market Financial Terms”… If you are getting as sick of the daily financial news out of Greece and its financial games as we are, here are some new Greek Financial Market Terms.
Alpha… the conservative party
Beta… the unsuccessful test of currency mergers
Delta… an alternative to Olympic Air or Aegean Air
Gamma…the relative to borrow money from
Bailout… a merchant marine’s job when the ship is taking on water
Greek Column... the line in red pencil to the right of debits and credits or assets and liabilities
Prime Minister… a cheaper substitute for prime rib
PIIGS… the cheaper substitute for lamb
Basel II… a favored spice for lamb or PIIGS
Budget… a rough financial guide to be altered whenever, also called a cookbook
Account Deficit… the new modern day accounting standard
Taxes… something that tourists pay
Austerity Package… a promise, followed by a wink
Euro… that paper that took away your printing presses
Drachma… the reintroduced currency of 2011
Social Security… figuring out how to get around Euro rules and regulations
Retirement Age… 47?
Average Work Week… 30 hours on the books, 12 hours in office
Unemployment… the greatest job
Retirement Account... what is kept under the mattress
Repo Market… an exchange turning in islands and ships to pay for debt
Goldman Sachs… the nation’s bookie
National Bank of Greece… the Country’s betting line each weekday in Vegas
Stock market… where you buy lamb and other food
Greek stock certificates… wallpaper
Government Bond… vouchers used to buy islands at a later date
GDP… the total domestic value of olive oil and tourism
Credit Default Swap… trading canceled credit cards with friends and family
Credit Spread… owing money to multiple friends and family members
Germany… boss
France… the assistant to the boss
Socialism… an economic experiment, much like beta
JON C. OGG
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