24 Pumpkin Spice Things We Really Don’t Need This Fall

England’s Twining family got into the tea trade in the 17th century. By 1749, Thomas Twining’s company was exporting tea to America, and in 1837, it began supplying tea to the royal family. You’d think that a company with that distinguished lineage would be above mere fad. But nooooo. Chai, which originates in India, is already spiced tea, typically involving such “pumpkin spices” as cinnamon, ginger, and cloves, as well as cardamom and pepper. Twinings Pumpkin Spice Chai adds nutmeg and allspice to what was already a perfectly good aromatic beverage, presumably just so Twinings can tap into pumpkin spice mania. We are not amused.

Sure, the aroma of pumpkin spice can be overwhelming at times, but presumably almost anyone would find it preferable to the odor of, well, ordure. Here’s a spray to not exactly clear the air but fill it with something pleasant, if perhaps overused. Shouldn’t the name be “After You Go,” though?

Tortilla chips — deep-fried triangles or strips of corn tortilla (or some industrial approximation of same) — have gotten along fine for many years with nothing but salsa, or maybe some melted nacho cheese, for company. Obviously, the innovative folks at Trader Joe’s thought the chips needed a little help. The grocery store chain stirred as much pumpkin purée as it could into the corn-dough base of the tortillas, then added pumpkin seeds, cinnamon, and nutmeg for good measure. At least now we know what we can do with that pumpkin pie salsa (see No. 18).

You know how designers sometimes call dark purple “eggplant” and pale green “pistachio”? Apparently, “pumpkin spice” has become a color name, too, as in the case of Bernat’s Pumpkin Spice Blanket knitting yarn. No spice aromas are involved here, thankfully; it’s all about the orange. But then it should just be called “pumpkin,” shouldn’t it? The color of pumpkin spice — ground-up cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, cloves, and nutmeg — would be an earthy brown. The Bernat’s folks couldn’t be trying to capitalize on a craze, could they?